6 years ago, I was just barely 20, celebrating Mother's Day with my husband and being pregnant with our first child. I anticipated becoming a mommy, as it had been my dream since I was a little girl. Lots of little girls dream to be a doctor or a zoologist or a teacher... My ultimate dream was to be a mommy to a houseful of children, and I was so excited to begin that journey!
5 years ago, I held a 7 month old little girl in my arms, celebrating my first true Mother's Day. While motherhood started out rough with a child with a cleft palate and only one functioning kidney with multiple problems, I was still elated and living my dream!
3 years ago, I held our precious miracle boy, 5 months old and growing so fast, and held the hand of my 2 year old daughter. Motherhood with Aydan was also a rough start. He began his life 9 weeks early, a month long stay in the NICU, but overcame quickly and grew strong! Before having him, I was worried about going from one to two children. Some said it was easy, some said it was difficult. Transitioning from 1 to 2 was much easier than I anticipated and again, I was living my dream, and couldn't wait to have more! Unfortunately, my dream shattered, as we were told that with my health issues and the chances of future pregnancies having major difficulties, we should think about not getting pregnant again because it was just too risky... My heart broke, and Michael and I knew we weren't finished with our family, but didn't know what God's plan would be.
1 year ago, I was anxiously preparing materials for our dossier, excited to be adopting one child, 0-2 years of age. I was so excited to be on the adoption journey and felt blessed that this was how God decided to grow our family of 4 to a family of 5.
Today.... Today, I sit on the couch as my husband and two children pamper me, not allowing me to get up for anything (except to go potty!). I sit here feeling so absolutely blessed. I have the most wonderful husband who I'm blessed to call my absolute best friend. There are so many days that I look at him in awe, wondering how God allowed ME to have Michael in my life! I have a beautiful 5 year old daughter who is not only the spitting image of me, but acts like me in so many ways it often scares Michael and I! She is also so in tune with God, that I'm often jealous of her relationship with Him, and it teaches me to become more like a child, spiritually. I have a 3 year old little boy who is the epitome of love. He's one of the most loving, snuggly, little boys I've ever known, and I'm SO stinkin' blessed to be his momma.
|Mommy, Ilana, and Aydan - Mother's Day 2012|
And now, today, I'm also able to look at the faces (in pictures) of not one, but TWO precious little Ethiopian boys. And as I sit there, staring at their beautiful little faces, I again, question how I am so blessed that God chose me! ME! Of all the amazing mothers in the world, God chose ME to be their mother. I cannot wait for them to come home and to go from a family of 4 to a family of SIX!
As I sit here, celebrating Mother's Day, I'm also thinking and praying for "M" and "E's" mothers. Their mothers that loved them so much that they knew it would be best to give them a better life, knowing they could not take care for them well on their own. My heart breaks for them because I can't even imagine having to make the decision and how hard it must have been...
I want to take the time to also wish a very happy Mother's Day to my mom. For guiding me and showing me on how to be a great mother. For teaching me about God and setting a wonderful example on how to be a Godly mom and wife. You, Mom, are the true epitome of a Proverbs 31 wife, and I'm so proud and blessed to call you MY mom! I love you!!